love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize