Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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