some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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