eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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