Barsexuality is the new black.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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