So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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