im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
