My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
PANTIES FOUND
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