he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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