It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
