I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
