Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
