I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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