at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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