ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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