I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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