don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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