Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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