that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
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