I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
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