there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
