You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize