lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
