Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize
