Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Randomize