Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
