My girlfriend figured out who you are.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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