too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
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