Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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