best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
