That's when you crack a 10am beer
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Randomize
