A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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