That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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