He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
