yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize