FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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