yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Someone came in the potted fern
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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