what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize