Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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