The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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