Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize