Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
