i just made my gag reflex go away.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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