Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
