I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
