seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
