4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
