you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
