I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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