So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
