we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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