So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize